I've had a love/hate relationship with writing lately. It's something I have always enjoyed on a deeply personal level, but it's also a job. And when I tried to write a personal blog associated with what we do on the farm, I struggled to feel authentic in my voice. I felt like I had to set myself up as an expert - to create 'how-to' articles or offer value to my reader to entice them to come back. I felt like I had to sell something, if only my services as a #writer.

Well, I'm done with that. I've actually been done with that for awhile. No more hussle, no more trying to teach or impress. I have never been good at that anyway. I abandoned my website and blog ages ago. Only recently was I finally able to look at it, salvage some bits, and find inspiration to try something new.

This something new has come about as part of a larger realization. Yes, I am a working writer, but I left the world of freelancing a long time ago and can no longer return to that reality. If I lose my job to AI, I'm not looking back.

I've recently settled into the comforting realization that if anything happens to my stable employment, this farm project is here and nearly ready to sustain us. It's Fundo San Benito, or bust. My future, and that of my family is in sustainable coffee and cacao. It's in agroecology. It's in growing this business.

The absolute faith I have in the viability of this project has finally allowed me to let go of the need for a "just in case" website and online portfolio. From now on, my non-work writing activities will be focused on a low pressure, once monthly newsletter about our farm activities. I'm slowly dismanteling my website and setting up a Substack. I actually feel good enough about it to share the first introductory post.

To all of you that have been so supportive and encouraging over the last couple of years, thank you! I hope you'll check out this next endeavor.

open.substack.com/pub/traciray…